My brother and I had a funny conversation the other day while driving home from my dad's house. I think the whole thing began with the 4 pound chocolate rabbit my dad gave us for Easter.

My brother said that he was bummed that dad hadn't got us a Wii instead. I told him that this was Easter and we never get presents for Easter. But come to think of it, it's super cold outside for April (thanks Al Gore you're certainly a smart one with that global warming FUD you idiot).

Since it's so cold outside it may as well just be Christmas. I mean after all, Christmas day we didn't have any snow (just like Easter) and Christmas day it was about 20 degrees outside; just like Easter.

So logically we should just combine Easter and Christmas into one holiday and be done with it.

It's at about this point though that I got to thinking. From the Catholic point of view, I know Christmas revolves around the birth of Jesus, so what does Easter revolve around? He thought for a second and then rattled off it revolved around the death of Jesus.

Hehe, so hang with me here. If we combine the two holidays, then I guess that means we'd be celebrating the simultaneous birth and death of Jesus (from a Catholic point of view). Wait, but that sounds impossible. Oh please. Like my boss tells me on an almost daily basis; think outside the box.

So how could Jesus be born and die on the same day? Well, I guess he could be born and then die of SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) later that night. Ahh, well that does it then, that's how it could be possible.

But wait, wasn't Jesus like 30 years old when he was pwned? True. So how do you explain that one? Well, if pop culture has a say in my theory (and it does) then I'd point you to the movie Jack</a> with Robin Williams. So theoretically, if Jesus had the same medical condition that Jack did (he ages 4 times faster than a normal human being) let's say that Jesus...in infant form...looked like a 30 year old man.

Aha you say, that makes so much sense. Jesus was all over the pedophile scene right? Hanging around with little boys and saying shit along the lines of children being so pure and innocent and free of sin. But if we say that Jesus had this condition, then in reality he's more like just a really old man-ish looking 3 or 4 year old. Great.

But wait! Jesus was crucified, so there's no way he could have died of SIDS. Hrmm, touche` he was crucified wasn't he. Ok, well, Jesus might not have died from SIDS. Instead it's likely he died of CIDS (Crucified Infant Death Syndrome). Success!

Wow, so if Jesus was a 3 - 4 year old who was crucified, then that means that the romans or whoever crucified him, actually killed a child. Ok, well I guess that's not so terribly unlikely. Those people we're pretty hell bent on killing the first born in every family right?